October 10, 2022
I’ve written about it here on my blog and have elaborated on it even more in my book: deconverting from fundamentalist religion is a lot more than ceasing to believe in supernatural dogma. It harms your seven life areas as well. Recovering from the damage caused by a difficult deconversion from religion involves getting your life areas back on track.
One of the seven life areas that is upended by leaving religion is your hobbies. Before, you were taught that all of your talents and gifts were given to you by God and that they should only be used to glorify God. However, now that you’ve left religion, this is no longer true. You are free to engage in your hobbies for you and only you.
Picking up some new hobbies is also a great way to help you recover from a painful deconversion. A couple weeks ago I wrote an article called 3 Positive, Masculine Hobbies for Deconverted Men. Now, here are three MORE great hobbies for recently Deconverted Men:
Joining a Sports League
In the previous article, I included working out on the list of good hobbies for recently-deconverted men. However, lifting weights can be a lonesome, solo endeavor. Another great way to stay physically active while getting connected with other men is by joining a sports league. It could be basketball, football, softball, volleyball, or Ultimate Frisbee, to name just a few examples (although, feel free to forget about Ultimate Frisbee if you want; I don’t know why, but Christian men seem to love Ultimate, so it could be that it’ll remind you too much of church culture). Whatever sport you’re interested in, there’s probably a hobby league in your town that you can join.
Not only will playing in a sports league help you stay physically fit, it will also give you a much-needed sense of camaraderie and brotherhood. When you’re deconverting from religion, you often lose your community of friends. Joining a sports league is a great way to fill that void. There’s just a lot of masculine energy happening whenever a group of men strive for something as a team, even if the sport you’re playing is just for fun on the weekends.
Technical Work You Do With Your Hands
In the previous article, I mentioned woodworking. However, other kinds of work you do with your hands should not be discounted. For example, if you’re interested in tinkering with cars or motorcycles, that can be a great hobby to pursue. I have a friend who likes to do this in his spare time, and his garage has become his happy place.
Of course, working on cars or motorcycles is not just a masculine hobby; it’s also a very practical one. After all, sooner or later your car is going to need some work done on it, and it’s always helpful (and cheaper) to be able to do the work yourself.
Have no interest in cars and/or motorcycles? No problem. Some other technical, hands-on hobbies include building your own computers, various artistic projects, and even doing your own home improvement projects.
I don’t know what it is, but men really seem to come into their element when they’re fixing shit. Men love to focus on something and not come up for air until the project is done. Having a hobby that allows your mind to focus on something is absolutely more valuable then letting your thoughts wander to more painful places, as they often tend to do during a painful faith deconstruction.
Learning a New Musical Instrument
Another great hobby for recently deconverted men is learning to play a musical instrument.
Not only is playing a musical instrument a great way to express yourself creatively, it’s also a great way to connect with other people. If you’ve ever been to a concert, you know that there’s just something special about the energy that exists between a musician and his audience. There’s a reason why so many people say that music is the universal language.
And if you’re worried that you’re too old to start learning a musical instrument, don’t be. It’s never too late to start. I have a friend who just started learning the drums when he was in his early 40s, and he got pretty good relatively quickly.
So, if you’re looking for a hobby that’ll help you stay creative and connected with other people, learning to play a musical instrument is a great option.
If you already play an instrument, then consider learning a second one. And be sure to soak up the enjoyment of finally being free of no longer having to use your musical talents to exclusively perform praise and worship music.
Conclusion
So, those are three more great hobbies for deconverted men. If you’re looking for a way to stay positive and productive during your deconstruction process, I hope this list has given you some ideas.
Just remember, it’s important to find hobbies that you enjoy and make you feel good about yourself. The goal is to grow and heal, not to just find a way to kill time.
Take your time and experiment with different things until you find something that you’re really passionate about. Don’t be afraid to try something new. You might just surprise yourself.